Institutio Oratoria

Effects of mild absurdity are produced by the simulation of folly and would, indeed, themselves, be foolish were they not fictitious. Take as an example the remark of the man who, when people wondered why he had bought a stumpy candlestick, said,

It will do for lunch.

[*]( Lunch requiring a less elaborate service, but being in broad daylight. ) There are also sayings closely resembling absurdities which derive great point from their sheer irrelevance, like the reply of Dolabella's slave, who, on being asked whether his master had advertised a sale of his property, answered,

He has sold his house.

[*](i.e. how can he? he has nothing left to sell. ) Sometimes you may get out of a tight comer by giving a humorous explanation of your embarrassment,

as the man did who asked a witness, who alleged that lie had been wounded by the accused, whether he had any scar to show for it. The witness proceeded to show a huge scar on his thigh, on which lie remarked,

I wish he had wounded you in the side.

[*](ac. because then he would have killed you. ) A happy use may also be made of insult. Hispo, for example, when the accuser charged him with scandalous crimes, replied,

You judge my character by your own

; while Fulvius Propinquus, when asked by the representative of the emperor whether the documents which he produced were autographs, replied,

Yes, Sir, and the handwriting is genuine, too!

[*]( Presumably the legatus had been suspected of forgery. )